


worry

by onlyinafigurativesense



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Agender Character, Established Relationship, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, Trans Male Character, this ignores canon btw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-03
Updated: 2014-12-03
Packaged: 2018-02-28 00:03:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2711618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onlyinafigurativesense/pseuds/onlyinafigurativesense
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was too much, the losses they all faced. He couldn't bear the way Levi's gaze hardened after every mission, each outing another step towards stripping him of the humanity each of them clung to like a lifeline. It scared him, watching Levi slowly lose what little trust had existed in him before joining the corps, and now that Hange was beginning their field training, it was all Erwin could do to keep himself from discharging the both of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	worry

Lance Corporal Levi was not a handsome man.

He was well-groomed, yes, and perhaps attractive in his own way, but 'handsome'... No.

Something about his proportions didn't quite fit within the standards of conventional good looks. There was too much muscle on his thin frame, and his torso was just slightly longer than it should have been for his height.

The criss-crossing scars that marred his tanned skin didn't help, nor did the perpetual frown he adopted, his thin brows set into a firm scowl above his narrow nose and almost too-deep-set eyes.

Coming in from the field, blood spattered and sweating, those grey eyes burning intensely, Erwin Smith thought that Levi was the most beautiful man he'd ever seen.

"Levi," he breathed, pulling the smaller man into his arms. Erwin kissed him, hard, cupping his face with one hand, the other urging their bodies closer.

Levi pulled away, leaning into Erwin's hand and kissing his palm. "I'm filthy. You're going to soil your shirt."

Erwin shook his head, trying to pull Levi back to him. "I don't care. I have more."

Levi ducked out of Erwin's grasp, rolling his eyes and walking past him, towards the officers' quarters.

"I need a shower."

"Darling," Erwin said, catching Levi's upper arm.

Levi stopped, but didn't turn around.

"Levi," Erwin prompted, but Levi shook his head, his hands balling into fists.

"I almost lost them, Erwin, I-" He choked, his words catching in his throat.

Erwin pulled the brunette into a gentle embrace, pressing his face into Levi's hair.

"You're safe, Levi. Hange, too."

He kissed his forehead, running his thumb under Levi's eye, brushing away the moisture that had gathered there.

"I've got you."

Levi nodded, biting his lower lip. "I know. I know, I'm being-"

Erwin shushed him, kissing his temple. "It's all right."

Levi took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment before raising them to meet Erwin's. "I feel disgusting."

Erwin stroked Levi's hair. "You can use my shower."

Levi leaned into the touch, placing his hand over Erwin's much larger one. "Good. The water pressure is better."

A smile tugged at the corners of Erwin's mouth. "I know, Liebling. You complain about yours constantly."

"Only because it's constantly shitty," Levi said, turning on his heel and heading towards the barracks.

"I'll inform the capital," Erwin said dryly, following behind his lover.

Levi snorted. "As if that would change anything."

"Mmn," Erwin said, his hand finding the small of Levi's back. "That was the joke, darling."

Levi wrinkled his nose. "Wasn't funny."

The shorter man was already shedding clothes by the time they reached Erwin's quarters, the buckles on his gear jangling noisily as he removed it, kicking off his boots and trousers before reaching to unbutton his shirt. Erwin's hands caught his before he could start, pulling them away and pressing a kiss to his knuckles.

"Let me," the blonde said, his hands replacing Levi's.

He undid the buttons of Levi's shirt, slipping it off the younger man's well-muscled shoulders and letting it fall to the floor. He ran his hand over a long, shallow scrape on Levi's side, making him wince.

"Fuck," he hissed, clenching his teeth.

Erwin frowned, drawing his hand away from the mark. "Is it-"

Levi shook his head. "Smarts, is all. I'm fine."

Erwin nodded, continuing his inspection of the corporal's body, his long fingers tracing old scars while his eyes mapped out the new ones.

"How many did you lose today?" he asked gently. This time when Levi flinched, it wasn't from pain.

"Four," he said, and there's a hoarseness to his voice that wasn't there a moment ago.

Erwin pulled him into his arms, cradling him against his chest. "I'm sorry. I should have-"

Levi shook his head, pushing at Erwin's chest. "You wouldn't have been any help to us today. It wasn't..."

He swallowed, hard, then shook his head again. "I'm going to go wash up."

Erwin nodded, lightly caressing Levi's face before letting him go. He sighed, running a hand through his hair and listening as the water turned on, the pipes groaning as Levi stepped into the shower, warm water running over his bare skin, down his sweat-slicked back and-

Erwin blinked. The room seemed suddenly warmer, and he shrugged out of his jacket, draping it over the back of his desk chair. He sank onto the bed, loosening the top buttons of his shirt and rubbing his eyes with the heel of his hand.

It was too much, the losses they all faced. He couldn't bear the way Levi's gaze hardened after every mission, each outing another step towards stripping him of the humanity each of them clung to like a lifeline. It scared him, watching Levi slowly lose what little trust had existed in him before joining the corps, and now that Hange was beginning their field training, it was all Erwin could do to keep himself from discharging the both of them.

He could swing an honorable discharge for them, he was sure, he was young and charismatic and the higher-ups liked him, he'd snagged the rank of commander faster than any other officer, he could-

Erwin was jerked out of his reverie by a small hand on his shoulder.

Levi stood in front of him, clutching the towel wrapped around his waist.

"You're thinking too much," he said sternly. "Stop that. You were never good at it anyway."

Erwin gave the smaller man a wry smile, pulling him into his lap. Levi straddled Erwin's hips, settling against him comfortably and resting their foreheads together. Erwin ran his fingers through Levi's still-wet hair, pushing it back out of his face.

"I love you," he said, the pad of his thumb caressing Levi's cheekbone. "And I'm going to keep you safe, I pro-"

"Erwin."

Levi frowned, shrugging off Erwin's hand. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

Erwin leaned forward earnestly, his hand finding Levi's hips. "I can, Levi, and I will, I have to, you and Hange-"

"I know, Erwin," Levi said softly, the crease between his eyebrows deepening. "We feel the same way, you know that, but..."

He pressed his lips together, dropping his gaze.

Erwin nodded. "I know."

He pressed a chaste kiss to Levi's lips, holding his chin between his thumb and forefinger. "We should-"

"I told them to shower first. Don't worry, they'll be here."

Erwin smiled. "Of course."

"I get the middle this time," the brunette said, his frown returning.

"I have no say in where either of you end up," Erwin said, raising his hands in surrender. Levi rolled his eyes, climbing off Erwin's lap and shedding his towel.

"Whatever. I still want middle."

Levi climbed to the centre of the bed, piling up pillows behind him and punching them into shape.

Erwin shook his head, standing and tugging off his belt, stepping out if his trousers.

"Are you planning on remaining naked?" he teased.

Levi glared at him. "No. Bring me something to sleep in."

Erwin was already at the dresser, searching through the drawer he'd dedicated to Levi's things and pulling out a pair of black boxers.

Levi glanced down at his chest, frowning. "Undershirt," he grunted, going back to punching the pillows.

Erwin sighed. "Liebling," he started, but Levi shook his head.

"Shut up and do as you're told."

Erwin cocked an eyebrow. "I was under the impression that was your forte," he said, making his way back to the bed.

Levi snatched his clothes out of Erwin's hands, scowling. "Not my fault you get off to it," he growled, tugging on his boxers.

Erwin grinned, running his hand up Levi's side. "Mnn. Pretty sure it's partly your fault."

Levi smacked his hand. "You're a pervert."

Erwin raised an eyebrow. "Are you complaining?"

Levi's cheeks flushed deliciously, and he made himself busy pulling on the grey tank top Erwin had given him, not meeting Erwin's eyes. "No."

Erwin tousled Levi's hair, making him yelp. "Didn't think so."

Levi made an irritated noise and was about to respond when the door burst open, Hange entering in a whirl of excitement as they always did, calling over their shoulder to someone in the hall. "Calm down, I've got express permission, I'm-"

Erwin and Levi heard someone squawk "Squad leader!" before Hange slammed the door behind themself, grinning wickedly.

"Fine," they finished.

Levi snorted. "Your pet can't hear you, you've practically shut his nose in the door."

Hange shrugged. "He'll be fine. And you're one to talk about 'pets' Levi."

They glanced pointedly at Erwin, who was finishing getting undressed now that some privacy had been restored.

Levi's cheeks turned pink. "I ought to-" he growled, grabbing a pillow from behind him and chucking it at Hange's head.

The redhead ducked, laughing, and climbed into bed, throwing off their shirt. They flopped down next to Levi, tucking their hands behind their head.

Levi wrinkled his nose. "Shave your damn armpits."

Hange stuck their tongue out at him. "Not all of us can spend hours on personal hygiene like you, Levi. Besides, I like them like this."

Levi rolled his eyes again, tucking himself up against Hange's side and pillowing his head on their shoulder.

"You disgust me."

"Good."

Erwin climbed into bed on Levi's other side, now more comfortably dressed in a white undershirt (with sleeves, unlike Levi's) and grey boxers. "You two are so sweet to each other. I almost feel left out."

Hange reached over Levi to pat Erwin's cheek, and Levi kicked him. Erwin pinched his ass in retaliation, scooting closer to him and lying down. Levi huffed, pressing his hips back against Erwin's and throwing his arm around Hange's waist, burying his face in their breasts as they linked their fingers through Erwin's, the two resting their intertwined hands on Levi's hip.

"Comfortable?" Hange asked, glancing down at Levi, who was nestled in their cleavage.

He gave a muffled affirmative, somehow managing to scoot closer to both of his partners simultaneously. Erwin nuzzled at Levi's neck, rubbing his thumb over Hange's knuckles.

Hange sighed contentedly. "This," they said, "is super gay. Much like Erwin."

Levi detached himself from Hange's chest. "I'm fairly certain Erwin has never fucked anyone with a dick."

Hange gave him a confused look. "What's your point? That doesn't mean anything."

Levi shrugged. "Fair."

He glanced over his shoulder, waiting for Erwin's response, but none came.

Hange chuckled. "He's asleep."

Levi made a displeased sound. "He didn't even go out on the run today."

Hange kissed Levi's forehead. "He worries. He's probably more tired than us."

Levi nosed his way back into Hange's cleavage, letting out a small noise of agreement. "Go sleep."

Hange nodded. "You too."

"Mnn. Love you."

Hange smiled, closing their eyes. "Love you, too."


End file.
